Nowhere Now Here

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Over the years I have noticed a trend in my photography. To be fair, I notice many trends. It is sort of how I work: I make photos over a long span of time then see where the pictures settle and read them like tea leaves. It gives me a perspective on what I am doing that I don’t have while I am out doing it. But I digress. It is a lot about feeling, mood, perspective or whatever other abstract ideas you want to associate with what guides us through the creative process. I tend to be more in a black and white mood, for lack of better words. I love the simplicity of black and white. It pares the world down a bit to more essential elements. It makes things a bit simpler, a bit quieter… in a way. And that is a big part of what is driving me. I appreciate that simpler rendering.

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I think part of it is also the timeless nature of b&w film/images. Colour is date able, by which I mean, you can generally tell when a colour image is made by its palette. The colour films of the 1970s look like the 1970s, just as the colour palettes of today’s images have a distinct look that is temporally anchored. Black and white eschews this dating to some degree. And I appreciate this too. That I am more easily able to make an image that is not anchored to a particular time, because sometimes the image I am making is not about a specific time at all, and if that is the case I don’t want that association to be baked into the photo. If that makes sense. But I do just like the concept of time as this slippery, amorphous, crazy notion of a thing and so if there is a way to set it aside just a bit, to make a photo that isn’t necessarily of a certain place at a certain time but perhaps somewhere sometime, then I enjoy doing that as well.

So there it is, just some of my thoughts hammered out in a bit of a stream-of-consciousness manner.

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http://www.berndkugow.photos/

Onward Ever Onward

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Callac Lake Jan.2019

One of my photographic interests has been to collect an exposed roll of every type of black and white film.  For years I used almost exclusively just Tri-X. And I love Tri-X, but every roll of Tri-X I shot was a roll of some other film I didn’t and asking myself the question what would this look like with another film. I got a bit tired of not having good answers. What are the differences between Delta 400 and Tmax 400? How about Tmax 400 and APX 400? What does that Adox CMS 20 II look like? Or the Copex Rapid film? I think it is true that there is not enough time in the day to use every roll, which is why it has been a project that hopefully will never end. Unfortunately 35mm takes me half of forever. But I have been using my Nikon more and more. I can keep that trusted camera loaded with weird films and have been carrying it with me everywhere, trying to move faster than I normally do but not too fast that I produce a bunch of ho-hum images.

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Wood Ducks Home Jan.2019

It is nice when I do finish one of these rolls though. I just got through a roll of the Washi S. It took about a month or so. I also underexposed it a bit because I thought it was ISO 80 when it is really ISO 50. Ooops. But that is ok because the results turned out interestingly enough. Deep shadows, high contrast, no grain. And that is one of the benefits to a project like this, it nudges me in directions I wouldn’t have gone without that nudge. Would I have tried a roll of this out otherwise? I highly doubt it. And hence I wouldn’t have made these images either. Anyway, just thoughts on this ongoing experiment. Now the Nikon is loaded with a roll of Lomography Berlin 400 film.

Onward…….

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Susan New Years Eve Mont St. Michel 2018

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Tree and Birds Jan 2019

http://www.berndkugow.photos/

 

Veiled Longings

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I believe we all have a longing that one day we would like to live somewhere, have a house somewhere.

I believe that’s a longing for something inside; there is a place inside where that serenity exists.

Safe and sound with yourself. It is something I long for and I am working towards it in the most practical way possible.

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I looked back and glimpsed the outline of a boy
His life of sorrows now collapsing into joy.

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http://www.berndkugow.photos/

A Moment

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So often you head out into the world as a photographer knowing what you are looking for. I knew what I wanted to find on this trip recently. It was going to be beautiful autumn colours, ancient trees and maybe a lake or two. But as is often the case, it is the unexpected scenes you find along the way that can be the most enjoyable. You don’t step out the door thinking that what you want to find is a quiet abandoned table and chairs under the soft light of twilight with the leaves blowing in the wind and the  birds chirping. These things are more difficult to expect and anticipate, and it is probably wise to not try. Rather it is better to just be open to seeing them in a glimpse as you pass by on a country lane and having the presence of mind to turn around and go back. Life is a collection of the big moments and the small, the grand scenes and the quiet ones, so it is therefore no surprise that photographing one’s life is also comprised of the same components.

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http://www.berndkugow.photos/

Blowing My Own Trumpet

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Most of my photography is sparse and dark. I will try to explain.

Looking at my Photographs is like being alone in a room with yourself, or even a step worse. My images are introspective in a way that makes some people really nervous. The kind of person who immediately turn on the TV when they are alone don’t get my Photography – it makes them terribly uncomfortable.

After all is said and done, I photograph to see how the world looks photographed. And as they say the camera lens is a window to the soul……….

This image was made well into dusk. I was into that time of night where you lose a stop every few minutes and I was working with an initial exposure of several minutes as to be effected by this phenomenon. But I really liked the faint glow of colour coming from the moon and sky across the open field and I don’t make enough photos of autumn colour in the gloom of evening.

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http://www.berndkugow.photos/

Good Hair Day

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Finally made it to the local hairdresser. What a drive. Through woods bathed in autumn glow, past abandoned cottages, ever deeper into the forest, until you arrive at Johns house. I captured him on Ferrania film which is waiting to be developed.

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Meanwhile here are a couple of images to enjoy.

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Vernon Sinclair with the curly red hair
Breaks into Trinity church on a dare
Where the pastor hides a camera
To capture the rapture the day that it comes

Vernon gets afraid and runs

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And as we play out these parts in the relative dark
They hand you a script
And then they pick you apart
Memorise all your lines
But the most you can hope to be an extra
If they let you

All the while you felt so alone
And you were not alone…
You’re never alone

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http://www.berndkugow.photos/